Wednesday, February 14, 2018

Our Breastfeeding Journey : Part Two

In the name of Allah s.w.t.











All pictures above are credited to their photographers.

I am a breastfeeding mom and it's been three months of exclusively breastfeed my daughter. Alhamdulillah.

Aku terpanggil untuk menulis sesuatu yang nggak bisa dicapai oleh akal sesetengah manusia.

First of all, I want to deeply thank my husband, my mom-in-laws, my sisters-in-laws, my grandmother, my aunts, as well as two of my fellow classmates for supporting our breastfeeding journey in this current modern societies.

Why do I breastfeed my daughter?

1. It's challenging.
2. Al-Baqarah 2:233
3. Bonding
4. Convenient
5. Economic

#1 Challenging

When someone wishes me "all the best" when I decided to breastfeed my daughter, I take that as a challenge. Nowadays, breastfeeding seems to be an 'alien' for most human being on earth. I am still wondering why do humans oppose humans milk for their generations.


I am not talking about breastfeeding in public (of course it's going to be a ridiculous issue), I am talking about objecting breastfeeding as a whole.

Personally, breastfeeding is not just a talk. The moment I decides to breastfeed my child, I armed myself with all the information I can get for exclusive breastfeeding. My husband and I attended the antenatal class as prescribed by the doctor in the community clinic as we were first time parents. Alhamdulillah. I gain some basic information on breastfeeding.

The key of a successful breastfeeding is latching. Latching means, as a mom, 'the burden of proof' lies on you - guide your little ones to latch properly. My daughter latched properly on the forth times I taught her to latch. Newborns are gifted with suckling instinct. They are also gifted to reach for moms' breast. Trust me, I tried the breast crawl and I burst into tears to see the miracle really happens in front of my eyes! That moment was so beautiful.

When I say breastfeeding is a challenge, I really mean it. I read about the basic things of breastfeeding and I agree that 
the first two weeks were crucial in terms of pain

I suffered from breast engorgement for the first two weeks as well as nipple sore
I also encountered inverted nipple for a week. 

Trust me, I cried a lot for the first two months! 

Did I quit? Nope. 

Why?...because I am aware that, 
breastfeeding seems pretty harsh for the first two weeks.

I overcome those painful experience with knowledges. My fellow classmate told me three major keys  to breastfeed : One, get the support from your husband, two, READ A LOT; and three, drink gallons of water. 

Indeed, those three keys were the secrets of breastfeeding.

When she told me to read a lot, now, I realized why. Some people told me quite a number of misinformation on breastfeeding. Honestly, by reading, especially through reliable sources such as books, private and public breastfeeding awareness websites, I finally get the right information on breastfeeding. 

...and hold onto your words cause talk is cheap.



#2 Al-Baqarah 2:233

translation : "Mothers may breastfeed their children two complete years for whoever wishes to complete the nursing [period]. Upon the father is the mothers' provision and their clothing according to what is acceptable. No person is charged with more than his capacity. No mother should be harmed through her child, and no father through his child. And upon the [father's] heir is [a duty] like that [of the father]. And if they both desire weaning through mutual consent from both of them and consultation, there is no blame upon either of them. And if you wish to have your children nursed by a substitute, there is no blame upon you as long as you give payment according to what is acceptable. And fear Allah and know that Allah is Seeing of what you do."


This is a guide for muslims. I want to highlight the underlined translation. Substitute here means 'nursing mother' or known as 'ibu susuan'. It doesn't mean, 'go and pay the cashier for formula milk'.

Once you are a mom, I believe, God will grant you wisdom. It is up to you to treasure the gift.

Lupakanlah soal cukup ke tak susu untuk bayi, this is the main reason of breastfeeding.
Susu manusia itu dicipta untuk manusia. Pernah dengar tak pasal susu mommy ada kaitan dengan air mani daddy. Hehe.
Thats why, adanya istilah 'ibu susuan'. So, buktikan cinta kamu pada anak, isteri dan suami kamu dengan supporting each other with this golden liquid. 


#3 Bonding

Do I have to explain this? Well, do you know why some mothers prefer to bottle feed their child? It's because they need some rest and by bottle feeding their child, anyone can assist them in this particular 'duty'. It sounds quite harsh but this is the truth. Let's face it. I really appreciate my husband and people around who supported our breastfeeding journey because, this is the best feeling that ever happen to me.

Seeing a toddler nursing her doll, is sweet. 

How about, feeling the sensation of nursing our own child. 
Holding our little angels in our arms, look into her eyes, feel her skins, smile at her, and sometimes, when her eyes locked into mine, she stops suckling and smiling back to me. She forgets her milk. She just smile and locked her big round eyes and I have to remind her of her feeding session, sometimes I just hold her and talk to her to reassure whether she gets enough...
these are the true feelings of being a mother. 

Those were how our late ancestors did. They see us.

...and you know what? Once I breastfeed my daughter, I suddenly become the doctor and the nurse to her. Alhamdulillah.

#4 Convenient

I option for direct breastfeeding over bottle feed breastmilk since it is super easy and I don't have to bring all that feeding stuffs everywhere I go. I just have to bring my nursing cover and of course, a muslin washcloth (sometimes I forget about this and just pat her mouth dry with my shirt. LOL.)

I have to agree that, my back hurts since I am still learning to master the right breastfeeding posture.

#5 Economic

In this modern days, breastfeeding is consider as poverty due to the fact that, mommy and daddy are not able to provide their baby with nutritious food - the formula milk. HAHA. This is a total lie. Why?

Let me put it this way. In a more adult way. Feeding a baby is like an investment. People invest in expectation of some benefits in the future.

From my personal view, why should I invest on infant formula milk (cow milk source, soy milk etc.) that causes a lot of trouble to newborn baby, when all I have to do is investing on myself - the mom of my human baby. 

Our monthly expenses.

1. Disposable breastpad
2. Satisfying my hunger cause my daughter suckles all the nutrition that she needs, i.e. fruits, veges, carbs, proteins sources etc.
3. Mineral water

Extra essential expenses.

1. Nursing bra
2. Nursing cover
3. Washable breast pad
4. Breastmilk storage bags
5. Cooler bag
6. Thermal water bottle
7. Breastmilk collecter
8. Breastmilk pump
9. ...that cost a lot, maybe you need a deep freezer to store the breastmilk for up to 6 months!
10. and that super comfy nursing pillow! (never try any).

Instead of complaining on the price of a formula milk, and bragging on feeding your child with the most expensive or the most popular formula milk ever, I choose to invest on myself.

ummi's eating carbs and protein for you, Zulaykha.

Not to mention, doctors visit for lactose intolerant infant. Me, myself had a tummy issue after drinking fresh farm cows milk, imagine of my few days old baby, consuming cows milk for months. Why do I have to invest in such things when everyone is aware of the benefits of mommies milks, right?



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So here's the deal. Feeding a child is the biggest deal for every parents. For me, Alhamdulillah. Our breastfeeding journey is stepping miles and miles ahead. Everyday, every weeks, every months, every seconds past, I pray, for my strength in exclusively breastfeeds my daughter. Hours in labour room, I finally made it. Now, I just have to provide her with the best nutritions to watch her grow. Forget about the weight gaining comparing to other babies. A healthy and fit baby is a goal. 

All I want to embrace here is...for my next generations, I want a true human being to rule this planet. 


Breastfeeding is preserving humanity.

Wallahualam.

Sincerely from a mother to mothers,
from a mother to my beloved daughter,
choose wisely.
Sharifah Mastura binti Syed Mohd Shah


anak Abah & Ummi.

...

My current role model.

Acha Septriasa

Thursday, February 1, 2018

KeCabin by Bungalow In A Village, Malaysia

Hey there!

I am writing this using my email apps on iPhone (and now I am copying it to my blog post) since it is a lot easier drafting in here rather than to plug in the laptop while looking after my almost three months old daughter.

KeCabin by Bungalow In A Village, Melaka, Malaysia.



Alhamdulillah everything went well and I want to thank my classmates for organizing such a wonderful family vacations.

Personally, I really need this vacation to overcome my Postpartum Depression (trust me, it's getting worse day by day and I started to seek help from someone).

Being a first time mom is not easy and I really need an unconditional support, love and care from people around. Being able to be part of this family vacation really helps me in regaining my strength spiritually, mentally and emotionally since I was being surrounded by first time moms like me as well.



Honestly, there's a lot of things come across my mind after childbirth. I am thinking about what type of mom should I become. Am I going to be a true mom - soft spoken, cheerful, kind hearted, a strict mom, a pious mom, happy mom, crazy mom, a cool mom, or a bad mom.



Is there a bad mom in this world? I am so glad that I am finally get the answer by watching Bad Moms starring Mila Kunis. So yeah, I don't have to worry about changing my personality in a blink of an eye! All I need to do is just do it, enjoy every moment, and as long as I love my kid, then I am doing it right.

My best friend told me to just be myself in whatever I do. Thanks Zeema. You are the best!

So now, as long as I can remember, I am so depress thinking of it over and over again. I just have to be myself and love my daughter and my husband endlessly and...give myself a break without pushing myself off limits. May Allah ease my journey.



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Talking about our family day, I am so happy to finally know each other. We've been friends since 2012 and now most of us are holding our children. I finally meet my friends' wives and their children as well.

I never thought of having this kind of relationship myself. I mean, I was being exposed to my father's friends when we were kids and now I have my own friends to be introduced to my daughter! (It's like I'm having my own clan! Haha!) Isn't that wonderful. 

I hope ummis' friends will never stop to tell you, Zulaykha that ummi loves you so much and...please tell her that she has a place in each ummis' best friends hearts every time she needs someone to talk to.

Please remember that, whenever you need and misses ummi so much, talk to ummis' close friends. They will cheer you up like how they cheer ummi up whenever ummi feels so low and down.

Uncles and aunts will always be there for you, Zulaykha.


Ummi will not inherit you with millions of cash, it is this blog will guide you on how much I really loves you since the day ummi saw you in that black and white screen, you were the size of a bean! :p

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Let me see..our family day was fun. I ate a lot. We have pool side barbecues, karaokes, talking with babies session, and of course, enjoying that big 'jacket' fish! I never ate such a huge size 'ikan cencaru' in my whole entire life. Thanks abong tolong bakarkan. Hehe.

Yep, a two days and one night vacation seems too short to get to know each other's. We seriously need an extra days and nights for the next vacation and I want a "how to be a better parents experience" session! Haha. (Please take note, Ilham!)



The thing is, it is not the place that make us happy. It is the joy that we shared together - we eat together, talk to each other, being silly together, that make us a big family. No regrets!

Somehow, I have to admit that, what a great place and thanks to Ehsan, Hawa and their family for our delicious lunch, fresh seafood supplies and awesome karaoke sets! (Haha! I was like crying to my husband two weeks before and thought that I need to sing it out loud to release my final exams and childbirth stresses but then he was like...how are we going to bring along our baby to such a loud place?...)

Finally...I got the chance to sing all my anxieties out loud even though my heart sort of whispered, "is that okay to sing with my baby around?...and the other side of me was like, you deserve it honey." My voice sucks but I was so freaking relieved. LOL. I am so sorry my dear daughter. Ummi needs sometime to be alone too.



I even splashed myself into the pool few minutes before checking out. Thank you so much for supporting my unbelievable sudden behavior as a new mom, abong. (Ummi kau ni dah biol agaknya hahahaha).



Okay, I guess thats all I wanted to share. Thanks ladies for taking care of my child while I was in the kitchen, enjoying my huge 'ikan jaket' and singing my heart loud. Thank you.



Thank you for letting me to be part of your families too.

With love,
Ummi sayang Layla Zulaykha & Abah (abong), no matter what ❤

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